Liberty was that thing you lost when you "forgot" to vote because you took the wrong turn off the interstate and couldn't be arsed to turn around and go back, thirty seconds out of your way.
I've heard it said that beliefs are like assholes; everybody has one. That being said, I wish to inform you all, that my asshole, is the one true asshole!
i don't have expectations; i have hopes. i don't have plans; i have dreams. i don't have a future; i have a life. and that is infinitely better.
Truth is a property of statements. Statements are made of words. Words are made by people. Ergo, people make truth.
if you give a man a blowjob he is happy for a day. if you teach him how to get blowjobs, he will frequent prostitutes and contribute to the economy
Opportunities are usually disguised as hard work, so most people don't recognize them.
-Anne Landers
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